tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3865362691562112420.post1395833976169768212..comments2023-10-30T07:37:47.833-04:00Comments on whatiwonder: strange train of thought...greengirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06897315716330033528noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3865362691562112420.post-32297986953593585922015-09-14T07:42:19.759-04:002015-09-14T07:42:19.759-04:00anon,
I am not driven to need to lead either, but,...anon,<br />I am not driven to need to lead either, but, like you, i can if i need to. And this - all around - is much better for us, in our case than trying to constantly negotiate from equal footing. In our case - he is more 'something' than me, probably more leader, more decisive, more comfortable in the role. It fits who he is, just as my role fits me. greengirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06897315716330033528noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3865362691562112420.post-32501812192321977782015-09-14T07:37:40.944-04:002015-09-14T07:37:40.944-04:00Jz,
I like the "can match me" bit. And ...Jz,<br />I like the "can match me" bit. And i appreciate the yin-yang - in this and in so many aspects of life. I was just wondering how the yin really feels about the yang - or vice versa - since, even in yin-yang, one aspect (i forget which is which) is the negative pieces. I do try to stay away from the tropes as applies to us - it is hard sometimes - but not at all useful - as you say.greengirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06897315716330033528noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3865362691562112420.post-48974169897904488992015-09-14T07:34:22.224-04:002015-09-14T07:34:22.224-04:00abby,
Every word you wrote - that is true for us a...abby,<br />Every word you wrote - that is true for us as well. It is good for each of us, for the whole Us, and i know how he feels about me. This was a more philosophical wondering i guess. I don't have any experience with real live people in this situation outside of us. greengirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06897315716330033528noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3865362691562112420.post-86477385733738979422015-09-14T07:31:22.850-04:002015-09-14T07:31:22.850-04:00ancilla,
No - i wouldn't either - in fact i wo...ancilla,<br />No - i wouldn't either - in fact i would likely be extremely intolerant and very, very un-submissive. I am with my husband and have chosen to submit because of his strengths. There are not so many poeple in the world who would have earned either from me. He is in many areas more capable than I am, but i don't think he is smarter - and he would agree with me. He is certainly a better leader. I am - as you say - a follower, or more correctly in the larger world, a collaborator. And i do believe both are not at all 'nothing' skills. <br /><br />What i was reading made me wonder though - people who are dominant respect those dominant traits. The writer seemed to have just a touch of disdain for submissive traits - maybe she would apply that only in herself - but it made me wonder if people who are dominant generally respect submissive traits less in others....greengirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06897315716330033528noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3865362691562112420.post-8766755447025215082015-09-14T07:20:05.542-04:002015-09-14T07:20:05.542-04:00mouse,
Agreed - there are people all over who feel...mouse,<br />Agreed - there are people all over who feel entitled - they are extremely unpleasant no matter what they call themselves. <br /><br />I work in a fairly heirachical place - i'm used to being subordinate to others and others to me - i don't feel less human or less worthy than those above me, nor more anything than those below - just that i have to do what some people say ultimately, and some have to do what i say. <br /><br />Some things made me think about me and Him specifically (absolutely the only situation i have any experience with). I know without any hint of doubt that He doesn't see me as less anything. Yet i chose to defer, to submit, to allow him to correct me, to debase myself at times. For some reason i wondered how we each hold the contradictions in our minds. <br /><br />greengirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06897315716330033528noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3865362691562112420.post-56731552554419204812015-09-13T22:06:49.282-04:002015-09-13T22:06:49.282-04:00'Us s-types, in at least one primary relations...'Us s-types, in at least one primary relationship in our lives - believe we shouldn't lead, that the other person is more something than us". In some ways I respectfully disagree. I don't lead because I don't *want* to lead. I am and have been more than capable of leading in our relationship, but it wasn't for the best for either of us. I can do it if necessary, but I don't desire it. <br /><br />Do I think my husband is better at making decisions than I am? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. I do know he has a clearer head than I do when emotions get involved. So as to the latter part of that statement yes, I agree. I think a big part of my submission to him is the fact that he knows I am more than capable, yet I decided to defer to himAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3865362691562112420.post-3172316528780791572015-09-13T18:40:21.104-04:002015-09-13T18:40:21.104-04:00BG says that what he wanst is someone "who...BG says that what he wanst is someone "who's equal, can match me, and is my complement"<br />There are tropes galore that don't agree with him but for me, seeing it as a form of yin/yang makes a whole lotta sense.<br />But it *is* something I have to keep reminding myself of, for all that. The stereotypes do get in the way...Jzhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00301793291285112859noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3865362691562112420.post-79482020279326720912015-09-13T18:15:41.585-04:002015-09-13T18:15:41.585-04:00Master has made it a point to let me know He cheri...Master has made it a point to let me know He cherishes my submission to Him...and it does not make me less important or eve weaker. I was in control of my everything in my life for a long time...that was how I wanted it and achieved it. I am so much more content now....submission is not always easy....and finding someone to follow who is worth it is not easy..but all worth it. I am not sure how it all works either...but for me..for us it does also...and i am so happy to have discovered that...and this new life...<br />hugs abbyabbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15842526901481062563noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3865362691562112420.post-24741106324440844182015-09-13T17:01:39.400-04:002015-09-13T17:01:39.400-04:00Well, I sure wouldn't follow someone that I fe...Well, I sure wouldn't follow someone that I felt was dumber or less capable than me!<br /><br />I also think part of knowing each other really well is knowing the strengths and weaknesses of the other person. We can't all be good at everything. Some are good at leading and some are good at following. Some can do both depending on the situation. Being good at following is not a "nothing" skill. I think it has a lot of value, especially when combined with the ability to discern who is worth following. ancilla_kssthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10968994155747861194noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3865362691562112420.post-22569195842359173572015-09-13T16:36:15.123-04:002015-09-13T16:36:15.123-04:00Don't think, and Omega would certainly agree t...Don't think, and Omega would certainly agree that submissive doesn't mean "less than" nor does it mean lower or beneath. Omega is compelled to be in control, but he wouldn't be with someone who shared that desire in a relationship beyond friendship. He looked for someone (like mouse) who wanted him to lead and trusted him to be good at it. <br /><br />There are some D types who do act as though they're entitled, or feel submissive means they are lower or even stupid...<br /><br />Honestly, mouse tends to pity those types because they must be pretty lonely up there at the top all alone. <br /><br />Hugs, <br />mousemousehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17837530120535693314noreply@blogger.com