Saturday, June 18, 2011

sounds about right

I hate, hate, hate D/s to dog training analogies - but this one struck me...

Our dog is in training - he's not bad, but he's fairly big, and fast, and a teenager  (like the other boys around here...), and since he came from a shelter, his history is a bit nebulous.
The trainer explained that he needed two things to be well adjusted and happy and well behaved and all those things we want him to be: control/obedience and  fulfillment. 

The obedience and control make sense and, even though it remains uneasy for me to talk about, the parallels to D/s are clear.

Fulfillment, apparently, is equally important to maintaining balance and well-being.  I'm sure some breeds are fulfilled through their obedience - working breeds, police dogs, guide dogs perhaps.  Ours however is a hound - he lives to track and sniff and hunt.  Every fiber of his being wants to be nose to the gound running through the underbrush, oblivious to anything or anyone else.  The point is that he needs a certain amount of opportunity each day to do exactly what he was literally born to do. 

No - people are not bred to roles the way dogs are.  But i think the point about fulfillment is just as valid.  People, submissive or not, are fulfilled by any number of different things.  The control and obedience are not the whole picture.  I know - and more importantly, my husband knows that finding and being engaged in the things that fulfill me are essential to my balance and well-being.


  1. I can see why this analogy struck you. It rings so true.

  2. Very good point.

  3. greengirl,

    This is a perfect analogy. There are so many types of dogs bred to do certain jobs. The same is true for women and our very unique gifts we have to share with the world at large, our families as well as the men we serve.


  4. lm,
    It does, and it is obvious, maybe too easy to forget, in any kind of relationship i think.

    thanks - i just hope it works for the dog

    I think that's it - we really do have to find what is important and fulfilling to us and not try to be what we aren't, but pursue what we are meant to.

  5. This post made me smile-- dog training is what i do for a living.

    All the philosophies I use with our dogs I use with my own life in a search for balance. I think your trainer is on the right track


  6. Mina,
    That is too cool. I don't know why - but the dog training analogies to bug me - but some are so dead on. Thanks.

  7. Very interesting. I'm not a dog person, if you know what I mean, but I can totally see what you're saying.