Sir J had some things to say on the topic of my last post. He no longer has an active blog, but he offered this guest post and I gladly accept.
I take care of her
July-29-14
3:36 PM
I am a Dominant and if that was the title of the book of me then the sub title would be I take care of her. I see no contradiction in these two statements at all in fact I often wonder about the Dominant that does not think this way. For me the very essence of being a Dominant is control, I want to control everything, me, her, us, others, the weather, traffic, work, literally everything. When I was younger and more arrogant than I am now I use to say with some regularity "if they would just let me run the world" and people would laugh, I was only sort of kidding.
Now I know better and would not take the job even if they did offer it. However I do run my world and for the most part I learned a long time ago the only think I can control is me. I focus much of my energy on that now and I think it makes me a better Dominant and any number of people I know will roll their eyes and tell you it makes me a much better person, or at the very least less of an ass. The urge to control is always there though, just below the surface and never more so than with her. My submissive.
Controlling her is a delicate balancing act akin to herding cats. First there is the issue that she is smarter than I am, next the fact that she is a powerful professional at the height of her profession who makes dozens of decisions every day. Anything done that would take away all that she is and stop her from being all that she could be would be immoral and idiotic. Like many a top flight professional woman though she has moments of doubt and of being overwhelmed, she worries about being a good worker, a good Mom, a good wife, a good daughter, a good daughter in law, a good submissive and many more.
What I can do is take care of her, I can be strong when she feels weak, I can make decisions for her when she feels overwhelmed. I can take her mind away from the so called real world and I can focus it on my world. A place where she can just be and feel and go where her senses take her, I can focus all that she is on a single event or series of events that culminate in an explosive orgasm and I can hold her while she falls asleep with out a care in the world. I can decide if and when she will cum, what she will wear or eat how much or how little in any and every circumstance.
She calls it being taken care of, I call it control. You might look at and think she has me wrapped around her little finger, you may wonder how on earth I could be the Dominant and she the submissive. You might come to believe my opening statement is crazy. I know as she does that the only way I will stop looking after her is if she leaves and she knows as I do that she would only leave if I stopped looking after her.
I take care of her and I do it that makes me a Dominant and she is taken care of and she allows it that makes her a submissive. No contradiction at all.
Sir J
Thank you Sir for this wonderful post. It gives me insight into my Master, as i found myself nodding during much of it. I have known for a while that what we have is special...i am glad that you two have that also.
ReplyDeletehugs abby
You're welcome Abby I am glad it resonated with you
DeleteSJ
Beautiful! Thank you Sir J.
ReplyDelete~faithful
Thank you - SJ
DeleteIt is good to read words from you again, Sir J.
ReplyDeleteI hope that all is well with you and yours.
Thank you Lil you are to kind but then again that is you. Yes all is very well with us
DeleteSJ
Sir J!: Oh, very good to read your words...you are missed.
ReplyDeleteLovely post. Perfectly pointed.
It was fun to write again and nice to know I am missed, thank you
DeleteSJ
What a wonderful post:) Hope yall are doing well and thank you for sharing your words with us again! As Bleuame mentioned in her comment.....you are missed. :)
ReplyDeleteBelle:)
Thank you Belle, we are doing very well enjoying the summer.
DeleteSJ
*sigh* Sounds like heaven. Great post.
ReplyDeleteBrooke, I had a chance to read through your blog this afternoon, you don't allow anon comments so I could not leave any. I think it is our heaven which is right for us. Your heaven may be a little different but I sense from your blog you are beginning to understand that and are well down the path to getting there.
DeleteSJ
It was wonderful to "hear" your voice again Sir J.
ReplyDeleteThank you it was nice to "speak" again
DeleteSJ
It does sound like heaven. So many don't understand the need and desire from both sides of the coin- how symbiotic it all is. Thank you for sharing
ReplyDeletewillie
You're welcome, I think symbiosis in a major part of it, you must understand how you both fit and then allow for it
DeleteSJ
Beautiful post!!
ReplyDeleteLovely comment ;)
DeleteSJ
This is a wonderful post, Sir J! It really is a beautiful cycle of reciprocity, as it leads to both parties feeling loved and respected. With that, both are happy to make the other happy some more. Win/win. I love living this way, with Rob taking care of me. The key for us, is that I had to LET him. All the way. Not just my way. That is letting go and truly trusting. And a spanking or two! ;) Thank you! Great post- made me think about what we have. I am more than grateful! :)
ReplyDeleteKatie
The key is often in the "letting", I have a great deal of respect for those who submit it is much, much harder than most realize.
DeleteSJ
Thank You for this post Sir J.
ReplyDeleteI was wondering if your past blogs could be available to read...
They were great source of inspiration and information for
more people than You would guess. :)
Opium
First off you commented on my birthday so thank you for the unknowing on your part and unexpected on mine, present. Unfortunately when my laptop was taken and for privacy reasons the blog was taken down in great haste and more reaction then thought all was lost. I only ever guessed 2 or 3 so you may be right.
DeleteSJ
I believe it was more than 10 !
DeleteI hope sometime soon ...once again You will chose to share some of Your insights with us.
In meantime .. Wishing You all the best beyond Your Bday !
Opium