Saturday, November 2, 2013

words.....

....and how He defines them for me.

We are not deathly serious here chez nous.  We joke and tease and poke and laugh, and sarcasm is rampant.  We have always been this way.  There is a whole 'nother layer of innuendo, meaning, warning or submission between us, but no one outside the two of us would know, not even the kids.

But words have power, and lines can be crossed, even in jest, maybe especially in sarcastic joking.

"You're not the boss of me" is, as i now know, not an acceptable phrase in any tone or context.

To me it had no particular significance, just a joke; to him, it carried a great deal of weight - it was consent, and respect and choice to submit.  Now it is all those things to me as well.  Just like that.


He doesn't do punishments.  But yesterday i was subjected to treated to an entire month's worth of caning at one time.  No lead in or warm up, no manageable pace, no nice rubbing or encouraging words, though not, apparently, as hard as possible.  Still...it very much had me in angry tears.  If he did punish, which he doesn't, but if he did - i have to think this is what it would feel like - physically anyhow.

But it wasn't a punishment - it was "what i needed."  Which sounds like a game of semantics, potato/potahto. Somehow he has made it clear in my head that they are different - one is what he does, one is not.  One is right for us, one is not, one is very effective, the other just not necessary.   And our structure, our dynamic flows from there.  

It was in fact what i needed. That "You're not the boss of me" came from somewhere and i did in fact need  re-arranging.  It was followed by some delicious torment with a bag full of clothespins and a pinwheel... but the delicious part wouldn't have been possible without the re-arranging first.

But before that came the words - his words - which i find i pay attention to more so than ever before.

12 comments:

  1. Glad you got what you need. Master and i play with words,,,,and jokes..and sarcasm...and as I have learned...not all sarcasm is created equal.
    hugs abby

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    1. Abby,
      Sarcasm is a slippery thing for sure - and so i just keep learning... Thanks.

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  2. oh myyyy...that *was* an unfortunate...repercussion, wasn't it? Or do I mean percussion, as in using your butt for a drum...oh myyy...I have only been caned lightly, and holy fuckity fuck. You have my deepest empathy.

    nilla

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    1. nilla - ooh - puns!!! It is a love/hate/or hate/appreciate in the abstract relationship with the canes for sure. Thank you.

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  3. Sometimes the inner brat just comes out, I really can't help but laugh at your choice of words.

    But really, that did so sound like a punishment.

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    1. Serenity,
      I never did imagine i would be bratty - it seems so un-me. But sometimes i flail around looking for the solid ground and that's how it comes out. Thank you.

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  4. GG--this whole post made me grin, huge.
    Because it sounds so much like us, the playing around, the teasing, the sarcasm.
    Until it goes a little too far....
    Sometimes its surprising how we tell that we need to be brought back to heel ;o)

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  5. Bleuame,
    that was exactly it - i needed to feel him, i guess i got what i needed..

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  6. Um, you SAID "You're not the boss of me???" That made me laugh - what WERE you thinking? Ok, obviously, not. But clearly, that's worse than, "You wouldn't do that..." and a couple of other famous last words too... I'm glad you "got what you needed." Sometimes we just need a reminder (says the submissive who's been almost all vanilla all the time for over 4 months...)

    sofia

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    1. sofia,
      Hmm - i did - and i thought it was joking, kidding, cute - he didn't read it that way. But yes - he does take care of what i need. What I want is a different matter, but not really the point either. I can relate to your feelings - but it passes - cycles and all that. I hope it comes around soon for you.

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  7. I am so curious... Clothes pins and pinwheel? Ok, clothes pins, I can imagine, actually have experienced. But pinwheel??

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    1. Gud's wife,
      Welcome, I couldn't get a picture to copy in - but follow the link to a picture/description. It leaves pinpricks - all over.
      http://www.stockroom.com/Double-Sided-Pinwheel-P2435.aspx

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