Sometimes, when I'm sitting working or just playing around online, he'll show up with the leather cuffs and fasten them around my wrists, sometimes my ankles as well. He doesn't connect them to each other, or to anything else; they are just there, substantially present, but not hindering me in any way. He asks how much work i have left, or if I'm not working, tells me when to finish up. He tells me where to go, when, and how to be. I will work or continue what i was doing for some time. The metal rings on the cuffs make small noises and I am acutely aware of the leather around the bones of my wrists and maybe the tendons in my ankles. I would have expected that my concentration would fly out the window in these cases, but instead i feel myself settle a bit, i think my heartrate slows and a small little smile forms at the corners of my mouth. Remarkably I am able to focus quite well on my work until it is time to get up.
Last night, my only question was "do you want my hair up or left down?" It can get in the way, and I never know what he has planned. I go through my nighttime routine, braid my hair back, and undress, the cuffs not interfering at all, but magically keeping me calm and centered.
He has shown me how he wants me to wait for him: there are two positions he has given me, most often he leaves it to me to choose. I usually choose the one I think he likes more, but last night I chose the other, for some reason, it just felt like I should. I always face away from the door, away from him entering. This time I was kneeling tall, sitting on my heels, my knees well apart and my hands on my thighs. I can hear him approach, his hand goes immediately between my legs, cupping, grabbing, parting the lips and probing, pinching. I can't be loud now, but i moan quietly and arch back into him, the arch only impaling me further and easing his access that much more.
From behind he pulls my arms up, my hands behind my back, cuffs now attached there. His hand pulling my braid keeps me fully arched back into him, relying on him to keep upright. The other hand moves to my waist, my stomach, the flared areas over my ribs, just under my breasts. His whole hand makes contact, open and firm, touching and feeling for his sensation and intentions, not my pleasure. But the position, the insistence of his touch, the whispers in my ear, his control of me, all move me instantly deeper into another headspace, warm and serene.
My breathing slows and my mental focus is entirely on the points of connection between the two of us, listening for his next direction. My nipples ache in their hardness, my cunt twitches and throbs, my skin tingles; all of me actively waiting, seeking. Then I am pushed forward, onto my face, and both his hands are free. The calm and focused headspace gives way to a more urgent, reactive one.
The pain comes to my nipples first, pinched wickedly, then clamped, my neck and back bitten hard. I am now tightly spread open and secured. More biting, more pinching. His cock ramming my face and my throat; rubbing his smell over me. And the probing and the - what - the fingers and the tongue and the teeth, the pure stimulation, faster and harder, too fast, and too hard, i can't take this, but i can't move..........
I tried to explain, later, where my mind goes in all this. I'm not sure i can explain it. He asked if it works as well as the impact play. We are both starting to learn how the rougher play can calm and center me, how it resets me and re-connects us, how it creates a stronger bond between us each time. This is much different, but I absolutely feel more focused on him, more centered and still, cared for and of use, our connection strengthened.