Sometimes, not often mind you because i am really most often just very demure and compliant, but every once in awhile, i get into a mood that just won't quit.
This mood was cute and playful - or irritating and smart-assed, depending on whom you ask. And it wasn't the mood he was looking for. He had a plan and that plan involved me being quiet and open and pleasing and - well - submissive. He warned me that if i didn't get on board with the plan *now*, that he would make sure i did. Of course, i was instantly intrigued and all thoughts of self control went out the window. So i kept pushing.
Topping from the bottom? Certainly i manipulated the situation - he told me what he wanted, and i ignored that looking to see how he would respond. Maybe i would like the response?? So on the surface - maybe people would call it topping.
On the other hand, we know each other well. When he really doesn't want to play games - he just doesn't play. He warns once, then tells me he will stop and roll over and leave me alone if I don't comply. And I've pushed, and he has done just that, and frankly - it sucks and i won't push that way again.
This was not that. This time, he told me that if i didn't settle down it would "get intense." Sounds like a gauntlet being laid - no? Who could resist that? Not I!
He has in the past used the clover clamps always just hard enough and just long enough; he seems to magically know just when to stop. This time went well beyond that, to the point that i was furious and genuinely worried, besides being very, very focused on the pain. That got my attention.
Then he turned attention into complete submission. There is something about trying to get his whole fist up there that demands my entire focus be on him. It requires me to be completely trusting and totally open to him (I know - duh). And it always produces an overwhelming flood of sensations and emotions. He got me right to quiet and open and pleasing -and oh so submissive.
And it was a very, very good experience for me on a lot of levels. But it leaves me wondering if he would have preferred I comply straight off, or if he enjoys the whole dance on some level as well.